5. Communication Fundamentals in Marriage

Lesson 5 – Communication Fundamentals in Marriage

“Our communications reflect in our countenance. Therefore, we must be careful not only what we communicate, but also how we do so. Souls can be strengthened or shattered by the message and the manner in which we communicate” (L. Lionel Kendrick, in Conference Report, Oct. 1988, 28; or Ensign, Nov. 1988, 23).

Principle: Good communication edifies marriage.

**Take the communication pretest. Reflect on your answers later with yourself and/or spouse.

D&C 76:94 (speaking of those who inherit Celestial glory)-  They who dwell in his presence are the church of the Firstborn; and they see as they are seen, and know as they are known, having received of his fulness and of his grace;

This seems to indicate that in our perfected, celestial state, our communications with one another will be pure and transparent, without hypocrisy, deception, or misunderstanding. Since celestial glory is our goal, we should try to learn and use this type of communication now.

Scriptures about communication. How do you think they relate to marriage and family?

Job 6:25 “How forcible are right words!”

Colossians 3:8 “Put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth.”

Hebrews 13:16 “But to do good and to communicate forget not: for with such sacrifices God is well pleased.”

James 1:19–20 “Let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: “For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God.”

James 3:2 “For in many things we offend all. If any man offend not in word, the same is a perfect man, and able also to bridle the whole body.”

Mosiah 2:32 “Beware lest there shall arise contentions among you.”

Alma 12:14 “For our words will condemn us.”

3 Nephi 11:29 “He that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, who is the father of contention.”

Doctrine and Covenants 20:54 “And see that there is no iniquity in the church, neither hardness with each other, neither lying, backbiting, nor evil speaking.”

Doctrine and Covenants 88:124 “Cease to find fault one with another.”

Doctrine and Covenants 136:23–24 “Cease to contend one with another; cease to speak evil one of another. “Cease drunkenness; and let your words tend to edifying one another.”

William Edward Norris said:

“If your lips can keep from slips,

Five things observe with care:

To whom you speak; of whom you speak;

And how, and when, and where.

 

Handout – Emotional Abuse – discussion – fill out and discuss at home

**To have a strong marriage you must eliminate all forms of hurtful communication and instead communicate in ways that nurture, edify, uplift, encourage, and make your spouse feel valued and loved.

See diagram: The closer the man and woman come to Christ (or in other words, the more Christlike they become), the greater ability they have to communicate with love for each other.

 

 

 

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